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June 18, 2017

A Confederacy of Butt-kissers

Let's go around the circle and everyone say the nicest thing they can think of about ME.

I think my daughter's wedding planner would be a great pick to run public housing for New York and New Jersey.

Rod, write me a reason to fire Comey, to get this Russia thing to go away, remember I appointed you.

I think those Congressional hearings are going quite nicely. I'm vindicated. 1000%

Dear Sean, Kellyanne, Sarah, Jeff, your job is to lie to defend me and anything I do, even when I contradict you. You swore loyalty, you weasels. Now earn it!

Ivanka baby, I hope you'll go on those daytime shows and explain that I'm not so bad? PS. you look really hot.

Scott, we've got to deal the death blow to the natural world. What did it ever do for us? Kill everything. #MMRA Make me rich again.

And somebody get that Mueller bastard off my back. I'll ruin that liar, I'll sue him, I'll fire him. Hell, I'll nuke him.

Did you see my latest tweet? Pretty cool, huh? I'm on a roll.

Okay people, you're not cabinet ministers. You're saboteurs. Your task is to make your departments fail. I won't fund, won't appoint, we'll dismantle all the Obama stuff, and you'll be rewarded with a shower of dollars. Screw the poor. I hate those losers. You rich people are my knights of the round table and I am your King Donald. Let's go around the circle ...

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